Sunday, August 28, 2011


My last blog I was saying how there just didn't seem like there was enough hours in a day anymore. Well add being sick to that and that will explain why I haven't blogged or even read any blogs in a good week. I swear, here we are the last week of August and it just seems like J got home a few weeks ago, its actually been almost 5 months.

J is still doing good with his counseling. I have went to 1 of his sessions and plan on going to more. He is still having issues, but he is working on it and I am proud of him for it. He goes the 7th for his hearing aids, which I am happy about that way he can't say he didn't hear me.

I went to a new gyn and she doesn't think that getting pregnant is going to be as hard as my other Dr was letting on. Yes its been awhile, but we have been under all kinds of stress. So we are just going to keep trying and now that most of the stress is gone for the time being we will see what happens. I really like my new dr and she is so optimistic that it is almost contagious. She didn't change anything like I thought she would.

Friday, August 12, 2011


Where does the time go? I never seem to have enough time anymore. I wake and its August 1st, I blink and its the middle of the month. There just doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day anymore. I haven't been neglecting my blog or reading other blogs on purpose, its that I need more time in my day to get everything accomplished.

Sunday, August 7, 2011


31 lost, 31 unwanted visits, 31 doors receive that dreaded knock, 31 families with shattered hearts, 31 pairs of boots lined up with rifles, dog tags and helmets, 31 comrades remembered and grieved for, 31 funeral services, 31 names on newly made grave markers, 31 empty places at the table, 31 souls who gave all and whose lives leave a void.

I meant to post this last night, but I fell asleep. This is the biggest fear of any family member of US military. My thoughts and prayers are with these families affected.

Move the F*^$ over

So one of my many pet peeves is not getting over for emergency vehicles. Yesterday me and J were on our way to Nashville and there was a major wreck on the interstate. So bad it blocked traffic on both the east and west bound lanes. Yeah it was BAD!!!! So we are sitting in traffic and hear sirens (obviously) once J realized the the sirens were coming from behind us he pulled his little car off into the median to allow the emergency vehicles to pass. But guess what none of the vehicles that were in front of us did anything to try to make a way for them to pass. Guess they didn't want to get there vehicles dirty since the median was muddy. I was so mad that I wanted to get out IN THE RAIN and go knock on all those vehicles to tell them to move the f*ck over.

I also would like to ask these same inconsiderate people how they would feel if a loved one was involved in that accident, and because of them not moving for the emergency personnel, that loved one died. The matter of minutes in an emergency situation can be life or death.

What is really bad is that in the state of TN it is a $500 fine for not getting over for emergency vehicles. Now I am not sure how they enforce this since they have bigger issues to deal with, but I think it would be nice for those inconsiderate SOBs to get a nice little ticket from TDOT or the state troopers or somebody just to say F*ck you, you should have got your wheels dirty and moved over.

Friday, August 5, 2011

New beginnings

J went to his first counseling session this week. I think just that one session has helped immensely. That probably sounds crazy to some of you, but there is just so much inside of him that he needs to get out, starting way back at his childhood before his dad passed away. The counselor wants to start off just talking with J, then eventually add me into the sessions. So he goes once a week for the month of August and then I will start going at the end of the month. J told me the night after the first session that he has never felt so good about the stuff from his past before. He was just amazed at how much he opened up to a complete stranger. He has even talked to me about stuff that in the 6 1/2 years together he has never even mentioned. He has told me about the day his dad died, which before he has always said he didn't want to talk about it. I didn't ask he just told then I asked questions and he answered them, which really surprised me. I hope that he continues to thrive with these sessions especially since he really didn't want to go in the first place, but now he is eager for his next session. I think he has finally seen he can move past his past and that it doesn't have to hinder his future. I just wish that if I would have known that counseling would help him this much that I would have encouraged him to go sooner,